4 out of 5 pucks

Today my little Cassia is 2 years old! Happy Birthday to my youngest daughter:

Now..onto my blogging

A couple weeks ago, I took out "The Bipolar Relationship" book for my wife to read thinking 'well this will be encouraging and helpful to her' and the end result was:

Not. At. All.

My wife in fact read it while I was at work one evening and she said it ended up depressing her and making her SERIOUSLY doubt our relationship!! After some debriefing and reassuring, she said that the book basically preached:

You can never ever let your guard down cause one day your bipolar other will go psycho and you can't trust them ever because they are sick.

WHAT THE FACE!! ( see Modern Family on ABC for Phil's remark on this classic tv line: )  )

My wife & I happen to have a good trusting relationship that is able to distinguish illness from loving intention ( most of the time).  And we both want to strongly NOT recommend reading this piece of trash book as it is a "relationship killer".

Ok so there's my second book review after Electro-boy ( find it in the archives....can't find a link to it right now :P)

Jesus, thank you for GOOD bipolar books that help couples out there and help us to find resources that can help me and my bp community. amen

Diabetes...this time I have to deal with it

3 out of 5 pucks

Soooo what's new you ask?

Well my diabetes that I have been in denial over has crossed from "acute" to "here's your EKG test and you better look after yourself or you will be leaving this world veeerrrryyy soon!"

Again I am not afraid of death, as I will meet Jesus on the other side, but I feel I still have some things to look out for while I am here on terra firma....i.e. my two little girls and the birth of my baby boy in 3 months....

So I am starving right now...am on brand new "sugar lowering" meds ( 3 X a day....and no beer...*wah*) and testing my blood sugar like crazy.


I was diagnosed with diabtetes in 2002 around the same time as my first bipolar expisode, but have been in denial about it and pretty much eatting and drinking whatever I wanted.

My blood sugar AFTER 10 hrs fasting was 10.7.......and it should've been 6 or less....even a 4....

so I am gonna be as repsponsible with diabetes as I am being with Bipolar.

Cause I just don't have a choice.

Jesus; this is huge. help me take care of my body and develope some healthy eatting habits. I am sure I will lose tons of weight as a result of this so get me to a healthy 180 from the 207lbs I am now. Thanks God

Theophostic - Day 2

4.9 out of 5 pucks.....yeah I am doing reaaallly goood!

I had a chance to do some Emmanuel Prayer Counselling as art of the 3 day Immanuel Training session and it was really good. I am still processing alot, but from what i've learned so far, I can be a healthier, more spiritually & emotionally balanced bipolar as I bring damaged parts of my heart & life to Jesus. The huge picture Jesus gave me today was of a bed and i needed to rest in it....except there was barbwire & rocks in the bed...making it uncomfortable.

Level 1: Basic attachment skills are key to life....learning how to be at rest and comfortable with yourself. you learn this when you are a baby and when mom & dad nurture you and give you affection...this is where you feel 'wanted'

With bipolar I am always running a 100 miles an hour and I have to train myself to "stop & do nothing"...go in the opposite spirit....quiet and 'self sooth' in a healthy way.

I am learning that now and God is starting to take the barbwire out of my bed so i can rest there.

stay tuned

Jesus...help me to lovingly attach to you...help me to rest and be quiet & still...Bipolar be at rest in Jesus name. amen
RV

Tired...hope i can disarm this "trigger" for bipolar grumpies

2 out of 5 pucks


whoooooaaaaaaaa......I am running on 6 hours sleep in liue of my usual 8 hour minimum PLUS I have had no "rest" time: time to recharge by doing wht I like whether that is reading or listening to music etc....

For all of you unipolar and non-polar folks, a soft bipolar I like myself needs to be ever vigilant of his "triggers" to help avoid the "bermuda triangle" of a decent into (for me) super grumpy low -grade depression. Low grade meaning I can still claw myself out of bed and do my work even though I am pissed off for most of the day. A rich High grade depression means being comostose in bed with no energy to even breath...[note: i don't have low self seteem issues and neither do I have suicidal tendencies...mine is a loss of energy and fatigue that keeps me from doing life...]

I am sooo looking forward to taking a 1-2 nap to recharge thsi afternoon as I have a great conferenc eto go to on theophosic prayer (www.fathersheart.ca)
it is on how listening to the Holy Spirit to get God-powered counselling and healing for emotions.

I will totally blog how it goes for the next 3 days and share my findings with you.

For the record: It is only the unbreakable love & power of My King & Saviour Jesus that I have any vistory at all over bipolar...I lean on Him entirely and you can too. pus its free! It just costs you your will to live as He does. : )

SO Father...you are the everlasting God, you do not faint or grow weary...
Bless you and thank you for sustaining me today. In my saviou's name Jesus Amen.

Here is a great worship song from a guy who does not have bipolar but who does have chronic fatigue syndrome...meaning he sleeps 14 hours and he feels like he's had 2 hours sleep...


Everlasting God

Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord, we will wait upon you Lord x 2


Our God, you reign forever
Our hope, our strong deliverer...

You are the everlasting God, the everlasting God
You do not faint, you won't grow weary
You're the defender of the weak, you comfort those in need
You lift us up on wings like eagles...


ccli # 4556538
Brenton Brown/Ken Riley, Copyright © 2008 Thankyou Music (PRS) (adm. worldwide by EMI CMG Publishing, excluding Europe, which is adm. by kingswaysongs.com